igotacrossbow | open post

He lets her haul him up, automatically clambering onto the bed and curling himself around her the way he always does. If he's slightly more careful about how he does it, now, or the way he slides his arm around her middle, well. He thinks he can be forgiven.

"Paperwork like...what?" he asks, unsure what she wants from him.

Cougar lies on her back, petting Jake's hair like he's a very well behaved dog, humming softly as she basks in the knowledge that she's not going to lose him to another woman. He's going to be hers. "I need you to forge a marriage certificate," she says, confused why he doesn't get that. "Twenty-five children on my soul may be bad, but pregnant out of wedlock? Even worse."

He likes it when she pets him like that. It calms him down, makes him feel like it's not the end of the world.

What she says has him lifting his head, though, frowning at her. "Carla. Sweetheart. I'm not forging our marriage certificate." He had assumed she wouldn't marry him if he asked, which is why he hadn't ever tried to. Cougar is so independent, he thought she wouldn't be interested in that with him.

She levels a look on him that says that if he wants that picture of their baby, he's going to be putting together a form that she can fax to her family so they can avoid asking any questions. "Then you deal with my parents wanting to kill you for impregnating their daughter out of wedlock," she says. "Papi taught me how to shoot," she warns, fire in her eyes.

"No, I mean." He huffs, frowning at her. "I wanna marry you for real. I'm not faking that." He doesn't care about how good a shot her father is. He's been shot before, and he's more or less certain Cougar won't let her dad kill him.

She gives him a furrowed brow and shrugs. "So we go sign a certificate. You're still backdating it," she says, because it needs to be a few months ago. She can deal with them angry for not telling them. She can't deal with the weeping and angst of them acting like the world is ending.

Wait, she took that really well. He's confused now.

"You want to marry me?" he asks, seemingly completely blindsided. "Really?"

"I love no one else. I want no one else," Cougar says with a shrug, not sure where the difficult part in all of this is. "We sign papers, nothing changes," is Cougar's opinion on it. She might not be as romantic as a normal person, but vows and loyalty mean a great deal to her.

"Better for a child to know his parents are legally married. Or hers."

"Oh," he breathes, a little thrown by her nonchalance but willing to go along with it. "Okay." He'd do pretty much anything for Cougar, as basically everyone around them knows.

"Oh my god, is that what Aisha meant when she called me papi?" It's literally only just clicked for him. "How did she knows before me?"

Cougar nods her head, still stroking her fingers through his hair and over his goatee as she lies there, absently trying to ignore the boiling anger at the thought of Aisha. "Knows my cycle," she grunts. "Saw the morning sickness. Put it together," she says, fairly sure Aisha has known since almost the start.

"Not taking your name," she says apologetically. "Hyphenating."

"She knows your cycle?" He grimaces. "God, she's so fucking weird."

He sighs, leaning into her hand on his face, and scoots up a little more so he can kiss her cheek. "You don't have to do that either, babe. Jensen's a ridiculous name. You should keep yours."

"No, I like Carla Alvarez-Jensen," she says, like the matter has been decided and she has no say in it despite it being her decision. "The baby will share both names. I will too," she says, leaning over to find his phone, pressing it into his palm as she wiggles her way into his warmth to curl up. "Doctor Anderson," she says. "Go on. Go look for the picture."

The smile on his face should make it clear he really likes the idea of her taking his name and adding it to hers. "I'll do it too," he decides. "And then we'll all match, like a real family."

Keeping a hold of her, he uses one hand to try and hack into her gynecologist's office system, unwilling to let her go as he searches for the photo of his baby. When he finds it, he can't help the soft, shaky breath he lets out. It's just a little blob on the sonogram, a little shadow in the sea of white that's her womb, but it's alive.

"That's our baby, Cougs," he breathes.

"Mmm," she agrees, still unsure how she feels about the whole thing, but the tender love on her face is for both Jake and the baby, the family she had thought to have in five years time with someone normal. She knows, though, the minute she fell in love with Jake, there wasn't going to be anyone else.

"Are you really prepared to deal with a pregnant sniper?" she wonders, giving Jake an amused look.

"You're carrying my baby," he points out. "You got me for life. No matter what."

Even if he had thought to leave her before, which he hadn't been planning on, he's not going to do it now. And she would never kill him. Or maim him. He thinks. He's pretty sure. Leaning up to kiss her again, he snuggles a little closer to her, keeping his phone close enough that he can stare at it whenever he wants. "I love you," he says, something he hasn't voice before for fear of being rejected. "Even if something happens," because miscarriages aren't as uncommon as people think, "I'm not going anywhere."

Cougar slides Jake's hand down to her stomach to where that barely-there bump is so that he can touch it as much as he wants, rubbing her thumb over the little bit of change there has been so far. "Hormonal," she says, "big, constantly craving food," she warns, going through the list.

She rolls him onto his back, straddling Jake as she leans down to kiss his lips as hard as she can. "Sexual urges," she finishes.

He slides his hand under her shirt to spread his hand wide across her tummy, feeling the barely-there swell that signifies their baby growing in there. "It's only nine months, you're beautiful, and I constantly crave food too, so we're even."

When she rolls him on his back, though, he grins and sets the phone down so he can rest his hands on her hips. "I am more than okay with that." And now they really won't have to use condoms, because it's not like she can get more pregnant.

Cougar grinds down slowly with a delighted grin on her face, licking her lips as she splays her hands out on his chest. "Backdate the certificates," she says. "And promise to break the news to my family," she negotiates, thinking that Jake can do all the talking. He's good at the talking.

"I'll tell Clay," she promises. "Think he will fear our offspring. Imagine what they will be capable of."

Her change in mood is like watching the sun rise. It's so beautiful.

"I'll backdate the certificates if you talk to your family," he counters, letting his hands slide down her thighs, squeezing gently as he goes. He may be good at talking, but he's not good at parents, and Cougar's parents terrify him. Not only because of the language barrier, but because they're Cougar's parent. He wants them to like him. He wants to be accepted.

"Clay will find out regardless. And our babies are going to be amazing."

She won't be able to do this as much soon, so she wants to take advantage of it while she can. "Fine," she grumbles, wrinkling her nose at the thought of telling her parents. She thinks they'll be happy that she's leaving the army, which isn't something she thinks she's ready to cope with.

She pauses, though, giving him a curious look. "Is this what you want? I want to make sure I know what you want from me."

They're going to have to figure out what the hell they're going to do instead of the Army. Jake can find a new career without too much bother, but he's not sure if Cougar will be able to seamlessly transition into civilian life. Still, that's something they can worry about later, when it comes time to worry about it. For now, he can just bask in the fact that she loves it, apparently, and she wants to marry him, and she's willing to have his child.

Maybe more than one.

"Of course it's what I want. I would love to have a family with you, Cougs. I just didn't know if was something you wanted."

"Thought it was years away," she admits, because this is catching her by surprise. She's young, yet, but it just means she can have children. "And the marriage?" she clarifies. "You want to marry me, not just because my faith makes it difficult for me to have children outside of a wedding?"

She keeps her hands on his shoulders, rocking again.

"Cougar, please," he protests, struggling to keep from pushing up against her as she rocks down against his lap. "I've only had eyes for you for years. I've wanted to marry you for almost as long, but they probably wouldn't have wanted us to serve together if we were married. And I wasn't sure you even wanted to get married."

She shrugs, because she's not sure what marriage means to her, but she knows that the vows are important and that she'll give anything to make sure she's devoted to Jake. And that she'll only ever want him. She opens her mouth to say so, but all the playful mood fades when a bolt of nausea floods her and she's forced off of him, morning sickness coming back with a vengeance and sending her to her knees in the bathroom.

Groaning when she's done, Cougar rests her temple against the cool wall, wiping her mouth and reaching for a towel. Before, she'd hidden this masterfully. Now, there's no reason for it, but it still feels strange to let Jake know. "Water," she says, voice rough.

Jake knows his idea of marriage is idealized, since he didn't have a solid relationship to model so he's been getting his idea of what a marriage means from books and movies, but he knew that he wanted it even though he wasn't sure what it would mean for him.

He's about to open his mouth to reassure her again when she makes a face and bolts off his lap, slamming into the bathroom just before the sound of retching hits his ears.

Oh dear.

He goes and grabs her a bottle of water and a clean towel before following her into the bathroom. "Here," he says quietly, handing her the bottle and rubbing his hand soothingly over her back.

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